Back on the Wagon...again.

So I got my first weeks worth of work outs. They seem pretty easy, but I know if I put 100% in all movements, it should be a pretty nice work out with a bit a sweat happening.

So here is my agenda for the week:

D1: run/jog 100m + 5 Air Squats to med ball + 5 Dumbbell Press x 3 rounds for time.

D2: Walk 15min for distance.

 

D3: 5 Split Squats (in place lunges - use abmats if needed) 5RM Push Press x 3 rounds. 2min rest between sets.

D4: 500m C2 Rowing x 4 rounds. Rest between rds equivalent to work. 

D5: Sled Drag 100m x 6. Rest as needed. Go heavy. 

 

For nutrition, I will be eating clean (whole 30 style) with the exception of a carb frenzy following D1, D3, and D5. Anythings game, but only after those workouts. Period.

 

 

The email I deleted or Tool-puss Baby

So if anyone read my self defeating blog before this one entitled CrossFAT, you may have noticed my little pity party I had going on. And while I was on that great little self bashing rant, I ended up messaging one of our coaches with a shortened version of my blog to his Facebook account. I then went on and did a few chores and stuff and was thinking about my note to him and basically thinking I was being a tool, a puss, and a baby. So I did what any Tool-puss Baby would do and went back online and deleted my note hoping he wouldn't have seen it.

 

Meanwhile life goes on. I go back to work for a week and then I needed to go back to the CrossFit box to give the coaches some paperwork and forms (I help them out a bit with graphics and printing since that is what I know best), and low and behold there was the coach I had sent and then retracted the note.

 

Evidently he saw it because he told me he had been meaning to call me and chat but had been pretty busy. [Sidenote: I know this guy is super busy with roughly two full times jobs.]

 

He questioned me about the email I sent and I told him that I kinda hope he didn't see it because I deleted it. But guess not. We ended up chatting about my fears of CrossFit and about how basically I feel that I am not a cookie cutter template of a typical crossfitter. He agreed and spoke about how he would be willing to assist me in getting to a place where I could come back to crossfit  when I was strong enough with enough lasting ability for the tougher WODs. But that I would have to dedicate myself and put forth a lot of effort to get there. He would set up a plan for me and I would need to make sure that I followed the instructions religiously and that I would need to come up with some goal to reach...not just any goals to be done at any random time, but very specific goals with specific time frames to complete them by. So I came up with the following:

He mentioned that he will put a plan together to help me obtain these goals. I have put these out here now in public so all who care to read see what these are and can help me be accountable to these lofty goals of mine.

 

 

 

So once again....here I go.

The CrossFAT WOD. Would anybody show up?

Yup--Notice it's not CrossFit, but Fat. That is how I am feeling now. It's been a while since I have been to a Crossfit workout and now I am finding it quite tough to get the motivation to go back.

It is quite difficult to be a 300+ lb. guy and go the box day in and day out and suck at everything, be last in every WOD, break the top of a box on a box jump, having to walk for 400 meter sprints, can't bring your leg down on walking lunges. get terrible stomach cramps while doing tabata sit ups and other core exercises, get totally gassed and having to split up your 10 burpees into 3-4 groups for warm-up...I can go on, believe me I can, but I think you may now have a slight understanding on how it feels to be an old fat fuck in a crossfit class. Oh yeah--I have to take off my glasses because they fog up and I can't see shit or remember what is on the board to do, so I have to keep walking up to the board to find out what I need to do next.

I wish other old fat people would come to Crossfit too, that way I could at least stand a chance. I want to work out and do the WODs because they are so exhausting and I know I am accomplishing  tough workouts. But when you come in last, maybe not even finishing all the "rounds" and then being told by others what a great job I did, really cheeses me off. I know I sucked--you know I sucked--let's call it what it is...hey, at least you came in and did something even though you really sucked and your form was horrendous. I am surprised you didn't quit sooner. At least then they are being honest. I would rather have honesty than nice lies to spare my feelings.

And I think I have heard it all. At least you showed up...you are doing better than those still on the couch...you are really only competing against yourself. Yada yada yada. Yup, I am competing against myself and lost.

So am I saying I will never go to Crossfit again...No I am not. But I do feel it might be a while before I do. I seriously think I am too fat to Crossfit right now where I am at. The WODs have gotten ridiculously tough since when I first began which makes me feel that much worse about not getting this shit done or done properly.

I feel there needs to be another division of CrossFit called CrossFAT (or even something nicer). One where the older, out of shape, those rehabbing injuries, and really struggling people can go to get a tough WOD done and not feel so inadequate that they cannot walk in the door. One where the warm-ups are about 10-15 minutes, but short enough that we haven't "shot our WOD" (by being so tired) before our WOD even starts. Then maybe another 10-15 minutes to do some weight lifting and then a full 20-25 minute WOD, have a normal WOD and we would scale it down as needed, but also have the time to finish it up without drawing a crowd. I know everyone rooting on the slow fat guy who is trying their best to finish is the proper etiquette, but it makes me feel very uncomfortable. I don't like being at the center of attention. I know everyone means well while doing it, but when it's every WOD you do, it's embarrassing to be that last guy to finish. I think that maybe it might be more of the congratulations afterwords and being told I did a great job when I know that I sucked and did horrible with bad form while being extra slow.

I hope I don't sound like I am bashing CrossFit or my Clan, because I don't feel I am or even mean to. I am just pointing out how I feel when I am there. Everyone is SUPER nice and very enthusiastic as well as helpful. Everyone genuinely seems to care about everyone else. That is a great feeling to have and to see the camaraderie that is in the box and between fellow members. I just think am part of the 1% who fall into the cracks. I know I am not the majority, so I know CrossFat would not happen and even if it did, my fellow fatties and understrong people won't even go to that. So with that I know I am left out in the dust to forge my own way until the time comes that I feel strong and/or fast enough to participate in this great sport called CrossFit. I want to do all this cool stuff-I really do, but I just don't feel comfortable enough to show up right now.

-sad & defeated duke-

Time is ticking away. My time may soon be up. I need to do something NOW!

I put the DEAD in Deadlifts

Well--I just about finished Whole30 day 18. It is getting easier to eat this way when I have the proper food around, but it is also getting tougher to avoid the temtations that are all over work and my home. A cracker here, a soda pop there and cheese everywhere. I have decided on my day 31, I want to eat Tacos (authentic), Popcorn, Chips & Salsa & a huge Cheese Sandwich. And then for lunch...hahahaha...I am not kidding here. I want all that shit and more.

Uh WOW--I better move on past the foods I am missing...although I think I might get sick from that stuff at this point in my little journey.

I have not been working out much at all. I went to Crossfit yesterday for my first real workout and it didn't turn out so well. First off, the entire class was dedicated to deadlifts. This, I knew was my wife's favorite, but I absolutely hate them. It's heavy and I have to bend down (this is just how lazy I really am--I hate bending down) and most importantly, I get super lightheaded when doing this...


I don't have any pix of me with deadlifts so here is a pic of me doing thrusters at a competition. Oh and I am the one with the fat butt bending over. The guy behind me admiring my fine glutes is the coolest coach in the world, Tim.

...anyway, let me go back in time. Maybe an hour earlier. My son had flag football practice at a local park, so I hung out and watched. It was a beautiful day. I was there about an hour and then had to head off to Crossfit--even though I tried a few times to get out of it with my wife and friend, but they wouldn't have any of my shenanigans.

I got to Mahoney Crossfit and began to warm up and started to get a tickle in my throat and my mouth got really super dry. I began to cough a little bit. Then we all went to get our weights to start warming up on those deadlifts that I so truley love. I got a few lifts in and began coughing a whole bunch more...yes, my alergies kicked in full gear. I stopped for a bit and left the room, went to the bathroom and coughed up some crap, then went back to work. As the weights got heavier for me, I was getting super lightheaded and having a tougher and tougher time keeping on my feet. Eventually, I just had to stop. I put my stuff away, went outside and walked and waited for my wife to cool dow.n with the others in the class. I didn't cool down or stretch...I was to angry with myself for such a poor showing and not feeling good while doing the workout. I ended up paying dearly later that night with leg cramps. That will teach me not to cool down and stretch afterwords.



Another pic of me doing thrusters...I like this pic, it looks like I got a boner, but I don't. My little guy is more like a frightened turtle at this point of the competition.

 

I plan to go back again on Monday. Let's hope I can do better this time.






Here is a pic of a frightened turtle.